Beggars at the Door

"A ragamuffin knows he is only a beggar at the door of God's mercy."

For those of you who follow me on twitter, you have seen this quote from me once this week. Rich Mullins was a man who truly understood grace. He knew that he was totally dependent on God's mercy, and he lived his life by the assurance that flows from such faith. Once again, his words have reminded me of the amazing love of God.

Today, I heard an interview of Rich that had been recorded before his death. Talking about serving God, he said something along the lines of, 'To be used by God is not a big deal. Look at Pontius Pilot, Judas Iscariot, and the Roman soldiers. They were used by God. What is truly amazing is to be wanted by God...'  (NOT to be taken as a direct quote. It is a rough paraphrase).

I felt like a freight train hit me in the chest. I'm going to have a Rich moment. Why pretend? The people God rebuked most were the spiritual know-it-alls. Sometimes I can't even seem to get a grip on the simplest of sins. I hate them. I despise them. Yet I fall to them. How am I supposed to be a missionary? How can I be used by God with the simple struggles I have?

With these thoughts running through my head, I realized again... I can't be what I want to be. I'm a ragamuffin. A beggar at the door of God's mercy. Yet, in His love, mercy, grace, and power, God has flung wide open His doors.. The reason I can be used by God at all is that I am wanted by God. God made a way for us to be His children: the suffering of the cross. The wrath of God on His son. The separation meant for us paid by Christ. The defeat of death and sin by the resurrection, and the forgiveness found through faith in Christ. Our debts are paid. "For sin will not rule over you, for you are not under law, but grace..." (Romans 6:21)

God's grace is the ship that carries us through life. I try my best to avoid the snares of darkness. I pray for help. I turn to Him for guidance. When I fall, His grace is there to pick me up. His mercy never ends. I've heard it said, "You can NOT out-sin the grace of God." That truth lets me live. Without it, life is an endless trap, with no way out of our nature of flesh. One day, we will be set free once and for all. Until that day comes, God still covers us with His mercy.

We are all beggars at the door. God, though, uses beggars to turn the world upside down. He always has. He always will.