The Sheep and the Shepherd

I often find my prayers going something like this:
My debt is unpayable, my sin too great. I can't be used.
 'Come, follow Me. I have made the way. I have paid the debt.'
What will people think? It would be so great if I could just do (insert self-centered idea here)...
'Deny yourself, take up your cross, and follow Me... I will lead you on the right path'
Why can't I just find the answer, Lord? Where are you? Are you even with me?
'For My ways are higher than your ways... Ask, and keep asking. Seek, and keep seeking. Knock, and the door will be opened. The answer will be given to you'

I don't always know what my God is up to. I don't understand why things happen the way they do, or what God has up His sleeve. But I have faith in the God who saved my soul, paid my debt. The God who gives me peace just when it matters, who answers me just when I start to give up. The God who builds me, changes me, molds me slowly but surely into who He would have me to be. I often feel like giving up, but it is then that the Lord gives me rest. Keep seeking, keep knocking, keep asking. Keep carrying the cross, and Yahweh promises He will be there for us. That He has a plan. And I believe that. I throw myself, my hopes, my dreams, my future, on Christ. And I have faith that He will lead the way. I don't always understand, but I follow nonetheless... Then again, do sheep always understand their shepherd? No. But they trust him, they follow him, and he provides, nurtures, protects. Sometimes the sheep stray from the path, but a shepherd rejoices when a lost sheep is found. Oh, Lord, how amazing You are! That the Ever-Strong rejoices over the ever-weak! Oh, Lord, we thank you. Thank you.

"The Lord is my shepherd; there is nothing I lack. He lets me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters. He renews my life; He leads me in paths of righteousness."